Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
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Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
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If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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