who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
