So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
my poor anus
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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