Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
