she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i was born a porn star she said
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
