this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.