lets start a swedish sibling band together
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize