Screwed.edu
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
God, I missed his penis.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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