Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Pooping to opera.
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