I must be too annoying 4 u.
Already got asked if we're dating
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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