when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
