Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
did you just send me my own nude
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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