We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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