I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
