I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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