jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I deserve this hangover.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
