We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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