question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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