there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
