super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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