i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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