i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
