SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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