dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize