How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
