I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
