Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
