Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
