She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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