Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize