He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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