So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them