oh god the rape fog is back!
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
