So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
