She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Randomize
