she smelled like a LAN party
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
