What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
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