I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
