and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
