Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
