the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
