Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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