yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
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