you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
