he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
