Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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