Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Help. Why am I so naked?
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