"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
