i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
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