I hate all girls vehemently.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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