I wish I only lived at night.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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